"Finally beating opioid addiction."

My story goes back 10 years or so.

I was using copious amounts of opioids (codeine) and abusing over the counter meds.

Started around 10 years ago originally. I injured myself and was prescribed co-codamol for the pain, of course it worked being a fairly strong prescription drug so I made sure to regularly take the prescribed doses.

After around 2 or 3 years I was still being prescribed the painkillers and at which point I probably didn't need it. This is when I started to experiment with bigger doses (I was no longer feeling the effects physically so I'd make up by doubling the dose) anyway this got to a point where my months prescription was gone within 5 days tops.

I would contact the doctor and lie about why I ran out so quickly, even once told them my pills were stolen, so that I'd get more.

Once the doctors caught on, I stopped being prescribed the pills (this is maybe 6/7 years ago now) so I begun to buy them over the counter, for around a year I was taking a box of these every day (32 pills, 16 in the morning 16 in the evening) I would feel this buzz and went on like this for a year. Again I stopped feeling the effects and got to my worst, I doubled my intake and was on 64 tablets daily which is 2 large packs. I would take a whole pack of 32 at a time twice a day without fail for 5/6 years, which was ongoing until new year of 2023.

There would be days where I wouldn't take them, but it would make me extremely sick and ill which scared me, it scared me how it made me feel without them. I was no longer feeling the buzz and I was taking 64 pills a day to feel normal.

Because I was taking so many, I had to visit hundreds of different pharmacies to even get served, after work some days I would drive up to 100 miles just to get them, I was driving thousands of miles to just chemists. Sometimes I'd tell my colleagues I needed to go do something work related just for an excuse to get to a chemist. I would lie, fabricate reasons and god knows what else to get what I felt I needed. This addiction completely took over my life and was tearing it apart, I wasn't myself, my relationships with friends family and colleagues/employees was rapidly deteriorating. All that mattered to me, was the pills.

Throughout the last couple of years I had seen several doctors who would always just tell me to give it up or cut down which was always frustrating to hear because it really isn't that easy. One doctor did advise I speak to CGL which I did, but I ignored them after getting in touch for quite some time as I felt nothing would help.

I had one really bad day where I broke down and called CGL, I then started to deal with Louise in the Huntingdon branch who basically got the ball rolling for me to get the help I needed. I shortly after had an appointment with a new doctor, who had been speaking to Louise about me and between them, managed to get me a prescription to help me (Buprenorphine).

All I can say is wow! At first I hated the idea of replacing one drug for another, but these things are like magic, I've been clean of codeine for nearly a year now and I have not relapsed once and, apart from initial cravings, I have not struggled physically.

The hardest part for me, was admitting I had a problem to begin with, it is so easy to tell yourself you can quit anytime, but the reality is it isn't easy, it's hard work, but hard work pays off.

If I can do this, anybody reading this can do it. Please do not be afraid to ask for help as scary as it seems and do not suffer alone like I did for so many years. You can do it.

If it wasn't for Louise and her support, I wouldn't be here nearly a year clean now, I would be in the horrific cycle I was in. As much as Louise will disagree and say it was all me (she's literally an angel) I could not have done this without her, just knowing she was at the other end of the phone has been my safety net throughout. She understands, does not judge and is so compassionate.

I have now been signed off as treatment complete and honestly it feels amazing. I know I still have a lot of work to keep putting into this, it isn't something that just goes away, but I know I've got this. If you're struggling, take that step and ask for help, you have nothing to lose and there's no shame in it.

Thank you Louise and CGL for everything.