"Made feel awful by a staff member"

On a weekend night shift, I met a midwife after giving birth via elective ceserian on the Friday. 

Unfortunately I wasn’t mobile like other mums usually be, I was still on the catheter etc. 

I have found this staff member extremely rude and not understanding. Was not wearing a name badge either. Upon first meeting I was already talked down to, over a vitamin D drop. 

Vitamin D drop that a midwife in my last birth gave me in a pack in the hospital ! To use while breastfeeding once a day. Therefore of course I brought this with me. This staff member has told me I’m not allowed to use it. They called paediatrics apparently, who told them it is not safe to use on newborns. Which in fact it was. The product they told them was a completely different product to what I have had. 

I told the midwife they were wrong and showed them the packaging that it is in fact suitable from birth. They got nasty with me saying that if I wish to give this to my baby it is going against hospital policy as it’s a drug that’s not authorised to be used. 

Excuse me, a drug? I was not using any type of medicine, this is simply a vitamin for my baby. 

Each encounter we had afterwards was very sharp. Couple of which were things like:

Colostrum harvesting - I brought in syringes filled with my own colostrum I collected and my partner was able to feed the baby during the day using them while I had a sleep. 

When asked the midwife to get me these colostrum, instead of getting me them I was questioned about it, this made me feel like I’m doing wrong. I was questioned why do I think he needs it etc. Even if he didn’t need it for the reason I gave the midwife, it is not in fact their business what I do with my colostrum as it was being administered by the staff regardless. 

I’m a breastfeeding mum and colostrum isn’t gonna give my baby any harm. However the midwife made me feel like I was. 

My reason was that I wanted him fed with colostrum after I fed to top him up to settle him as at this point I haven’t had slept over 30 hours. 

Later the midwife came back saying they cannot give it to me as they are not labelled with my name, which was incorrect - my name was on the pouch. With all of the syringes inside.

The midwife went out and a wee while after another staff came with the syringes indeed and fed my little man. 

Another encounter we had was:

When I was feeding my baby, and he fell asleep on my breast and the midwife stopped by questioning the noise he’s making. (he already got checked by  paediatrics on the Friday in regards to this and was all OK). 

Yet the midwife didn’t listen to me when I told them he was checked and all cleared. They proceeded to interrupt me and demanded that I listen, asking if he has been doing this continuously since Friday, and whether the midwives have been informed about this. I said yes, like I said a midwife brought it to my attention on Friday & called the paeds to check him.

The midwife asked what did the peads say on Friday. I told her they said it’s okay. Their response was to ask if I had again mentioned this to anyone since I said he was okayed by the Peads. They said okay and went and talked about me to another staff member, questioning if and when the peads had checked him.

Another encounter  was when I asked for pain relief because I was in agony, the midwife told me I needed to get up as it’s not good enough being on this catheter this long. I said I’m not mobile enough to get it out as I can’t walk yet. When they gave me the medication they set it at the table but my table wasn’t close to me so I physically couldn’t bend over to reach it, unlike other times I was given medication straight to my hand. This time they set it down on the table far away (I have picture to prove this) it honestly sent me in tears. 

Also there was a conversation where they asked me when was baby born. I said Friday. They asked me when I was planning to go home (using the tone in a way to say- okay we need you home). I said when I’m mobile enough by myself. They said I need to start moving then, as lying on this bed isn’t gonna help, I started to immediately get upset and anxiety kicked in, as I was genuinely unable to move.

That day, 2 midwives had to call the drs to give me stronger painkillers because I genuinely could not get off the bed unaided to a chair, I had 2 staff help me get up. Which they said something isn’t right, promised me to let the night team know so I could just rest. 

But no, the midwife made me get up while I was in absolute agony. I told them I genuinely need help to even get off the bed. I didn’t wanna say no because of all the comments they'd already made - which I felt were nasty, cheeky, and have made me feel so upset. I thought I’d get in trouble if I didn’t do what they told me to. 

So the midwife got 2 girls to come over to help, midnight came and 2 staff said okay let’s try to get up, which eventually I did get into a chair. Then asked to be transferred back into bed after almost an hour. I was in excruciating pain.