"I feel completely disheartened"

I feel completely disheartened, I had been trying to get a ADHD assessment for 7 years on the NHS. I was then told they no longer accepted referrals in accordance to Grampian current guidelines. So I sought a private diagnosis and now going back to Garthdee Medical I am told current guidelines don’t accept private diagnosis. My medication is £50 and then a £95 dispensing fee on top of the £2000 I had to find for the diagnosis and £150 every time I get a medication review. I can’t afford this so I’m going to have to either stop taking medication. I am desperately seeking shared care, I just feel like I’ve been batted back at every corner seeking help.