"Supported Living for ill mental health declined and plus back story"

The panel declined my application for supported Living on the grounds of Independent living would be in my "best interest" and that i am capable of living independently - September 24

I keep being met with the words "best interest" when something that i actually need has been declined. It seems like a standard response.  I felt neglected, uncared for and let down, misunderstood by this panel. I am not fit to live on my own with scant support work involvement.

I appreciate resources are scarce - but i feel the NHS Mental Health needs a complete shake-up. So much paperwork. So many hoops to jump through - for vulnerable patients like me. 

Bluestone experience- Silverwood- nurses seem bogged down with laptop work as opposed to having the time to spend caring for patients. Some nurses were helpful, and healthcare staff mainly caring and supportive. But some didn't either have time for 121 session or just had other more important things to do. And a lack of understanding of trauma, ocd from some nurses. 

Bronte - i found absolutely excellent on patient care and understanding of my needs- they went many extra miles in care and support - when i was there in Feb/March 2024. But Bronte is not my geographical area- i was there because of shortage of beds on Silverwood. 

There is nowhere for any patient with Severe debilitating OCD & severe anxiety to go to get actual treatment as an inpatient though.

I was admitted to Bluestone 3 times since last year as i couldn't cope and also had Suicidal thoughts and went for respite to get stablised. I am puzzled at the way the Bluestone Unit is set up by geographical area instead of actual patient need and Condition. I believe there should be beds for patients like me to have a longer term stay - and be treated for debilitating OCD. There are many of us housebound, and i have been that way many times. Ideally i would have been admitted to a hospital that treats OCD & complex trauma. 

I would like management to re-think patient care and need in a hospital setting. And maybe spend some time on the ground - and see what is happening. And update training on ocd, and complex trauma. 

Also the changes to Primary Mental Health are not '"I feel" person centred - more system based. OCD is now treated "as standard" with ERP only - and i was unable to access due to Suicidal ideas. And the only other option was to do an online course with other people which i was not fit for.

I needed 121 - due to complex trauma, ocd, and anxiety- all severe. I felt so let down - as i did not fit the mould and be a text-book case. 

I was rejected by them upon leaving hospital- had 1 session then discharged to do a course that was in my apparent "best interest". It was totally unsuitable for my complex needs. Hence 3rd Bluestone admission.

The CBT team did not treat me as an individual- as they did before lockdowns.

The team is now de-detached from Primary care  & now have sway over the Consultant Pyschiatrist- which i believe to be wrong - as the Consultant wanted me to get therapy - and he had no say as to what he knew i needed. 

Before lock-down my therapy was adapted to my need - and the cognitive side addressed first. I feel so let down. And my condition has deteriorated so much due, in part,  to my needs not being met. Although i do appreciate the time put in to try and help me - but the system had their hands tied in  relation to actual person centred ocd therapy.

I waited 2  years to get therapy,  then i was told that i wasnt a suitable candidate for it. My therapist and i did not gel either - as they were under pressure to get me through the system and also thought i might be pyschotic - which did not help.  They kept debating with me - and i was so stressed. They  apologised at the end. So i still have no CBT - and am with Support and Recovery- who have been helpful but again resources are scarce.

And now the panel refused funding for supported living to  someone who needs it- me - because it is in my "best interest" to live independently. I feel so upset and unheard.

I am not able to live independently until i get the support needed to enable me.