"I was left unable to get out of bed"

I was on E ward in the Royal Maternity Hospital Belfast in November. I had such excellent care from my clinic team during pregnancy and had a good c-section theatre experience.

My experience of E ward was awful. I did not feel safe, supported or cared for. After my c-section I was struggling to get in and out of bed. One night around midnight I needed to use the bathroom. My catheter had been removed and I was now peeing frequently as things got back to normal. The side of the bed was half up. I don’t have the words to explain how but as I tried to pull myself out of bed I ended up getting into a position where I was trapped half in/half out of the bed. I didn’t have the tummy strength due to my c-section wound to be able to lift myself up the way I normally would. I hit the buzzer, a care assistant arrived and I asked if they could help me or let me use their arm as support on that side to sit upright. I didn’t need lifted out of bed, I needed support (an arm) to lift my upper body into a seated position on the side of the bed. The care assistant said they couldn’t help me and I would have to get up myself.

I was laying twisted in the bed during this discussion busting for a pee. I asked would anyone else be able to help me and they said the nurses where on their break. I asked them to please help me get up as I was going to pee myself.  The Care assistant disappeared to find me help. It never came. In the end, I knew if I rolled and fell onto the floor I would no longer be trapped in the bed twisted with the barrier. This is how I got out of bed. I had to essentially fall out of the bed onto the floor because the care assistant couldn’t help me and no nurses ever came. I really hurt myself doing this, the twist of my body left me feeling like my wound had been pulled apart. It was awful. I have never got over the lack of help for me in that moment. Surely it is not unheard of to need support getting out of bed the day after a c-section? It was humiliating. 

After delivery my baby ended up in HDU. I was unable to walk very far for around 4 days due to pain. My husband wheeled me up and down from E-ward to HDU in a wheelchair chair. From the moment I arrived on E-ward it felt like they just couldn’t wait to discharge me. It didn’t matter that I couldn’t wash myself. It didn’t matter that I couldn’t walk steadily. It didn’t matter that I couldn’t lift myself off the toilet. It just felt like they wanted me out.

They were reluctant to get a doctor to come and see me when I asked for one. I had to ask several times, in the end I said I would not leave E-ward until I saw a doctor. It felt like asking to see a doctor was offensive.

The facilities of E-ward felt like something from the 70s that you would see on Call the Midwife. It is not modern and in my opinion it was not fit for purpose. What sort of maternity ward doesn’t have handles to help you get on and off the loo!? These would not be difficult to install! I cried on the way to the loo knowing that getting up and down with nothing to hold on to or support me was going to be agony. Even simple things like this made recovery so much harder. 

 The care environment in those 16 bays - women around you screaming in agony, shouting for pain relief, and new born babies crying was a living nightmare. E ward was just awful experience. Pain relief, empathy and kindness were in short supply.