"Guided me through these troubled times"

My wife was diagnosed with Dementia in June 2021 but this had been delayed because of the Covid pandemic. She was living at home with me and I was finding it increasingly difficult to cope on my own. My family were hugely supportive but I felt that I needed to talk to someone who “understood” what I was going through. In mid 2022  I became aware of the Admiral Nurse service and with my daughter's help made contact.

I was put in touch with a wonderful lady called Louisa who immediately put me at ease and over time has become a friend. I am able to share with her my innermost feelings and sometimes dark thoughts about coping with life and tell her things which I would otherwise keep to myself. On many occasions her gentle but sound advice has helped me to come to terms with a situation that was alien to me. To find myself dealing with my wife of almost 60 years who has become a totally different person to the one who I had known and loved all those years because of this cruel disease, is incredibly difficult. Louisa has guided me through these troubled times and metaphorically held my hand when I have been at my lowest. We meet once a month but without fail she says to me to get in touch in between meetings if ever I need to.

My wife is now in a Care Home and whilst this has eased the daily burden of 24 hour care it has brought new challenges for me in learning to cope on my own. I visit her every day but is that the right thing for me? Louisa talks me through it and has guided me to make my own decision but in a way that has made me realise that everyone is  different. What is right for me may not be right for others.

This service is far less well known than its Cancer counterpart, Macmillan, but is equally as important. People caring for dementia sufferers need just as much support because there is no cure and the pain goes on.